The issue that needs bringing into the open

If churches are to tackle the ‘sex issue’ a dramatic approach is required, according to Christian therapist Gary McFarlane.

It is a subject often spoken of in churches but rarely talked about. When a story appears in the local or national media, it might generate a nervous conversation among congregation members.

Headlines such as ‘Pastor Caught Downloading Hardcore Porn’ would shock any Christian, the trauma eased only by a sense of relief that it was in some other church where the office laptop was seized by police.

One man who understands the hurt, disappointment and bewilderment which result from church sex scandals is Gary McFarlane, a Relate-trained and experienced relationship counsellor, sex therapist and mediator.

Gary is the senior therapist and founder of The Kairos Centre, which provides counselling for those with sex, porn and love compulsivity and addiction – with many of its clients coming from a church background, including pastors and their wives.

Now, the former lawyer who originally hails from Jamaica, is keen to widen his scope to Christians across the UK. If churches are to properly tackle the ‘sex issue’, Gary believes a dramatic approach is required.

“We need something like the South African Truth and Reconciliation moratorium for church leaders,” he explains. “Christians have been hovering around the topic of sex, porn and love addiction for too long.”

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